I went into April with a heavy heart, as clear cutting continues all around me – from my immediate physical surroundings (watching the woods leveled to the tune of one tree every 30 seconds), to the clear cutting of organizations and industries I value (PBS, the Library of Congress, research, higher educaton, health care, arts, museums, and more), to the clear cutting of entire nations and peoples across the globe. 

But… but… but… 

Then I spent April touring colleges with my daughters on an accepted students whirlwind through six schools in five states. And I spent more time listening to and speaking of presence, and creativity, and support, and immediate physical spaces, and imagination. Wonder opened up in both the future and present tense, and I witnessed that despite sorrow and grief and worry, communities insist upon resilience. The long game is bending toward justice, to poorly paraphrase MLK, Jr.

And finally I spent my last days of April at home.

I opened the week on a college campus on Tuesday, engaged in conversation about writing and story and public health and engaging emotions as well as minds. That night, I connected with friends across the country over Zoom to spend an hour writing together.

Wednesday night, I spent the evening at the library with 19 people from my home community, all drawing and painting and collaging and making things together. Parallel play at its abolute best, months after I proposed the Art Club to my Director at the library. An imagined gathering manifest in the best way.

Thursday night, I returned to the library for a glorious sound bath, and walked out feeling as if I’d been floating in a deep massage for the body and the brain. 

On Friday, the page turned from April to May, and I spent the evening full of promise, outdoors, under moderate rainfall, planting seeds in my raised garden beds. Believing, whole-heartedly, that sun and rain and soil will remind the seeds what they’re meant to be, and that they will transform. A commitment to nourishment and growth, noticing and attention.

It is not all puppies and rainbows. Beyond the rest and the shine, there is deep worry. But April brought great joy.

Something about youth and Spring feels like renewal. And I’m so very grateful to savor the moment.